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Sealion, seriously now

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  • #16
    Originally posted by T. A. Gardner View Post
    That whooshing sound was my humor going right on past......
    Oooh! that busy freeway

    Paul
    ‘Tis said his form is tiny, yet
    All human ills he can subdue,
    Or with a bauble or medal
    Can win mans heart for you;
    And many a blessing know to stew
    To make a megloamaniac bright;
    Give honour to the dainty Corse,
    The Pixie is a little shite.

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    • #17
      I'd check Tooze or someone like that to see if the German economy could handle the diversion of steel needed to make the razors so necessary to stop the nun's unusually hairy legs from spoiling the whole plan.
      Matthew 5:9 Blessed are the cheesemakers

      That's right bitches. I'm blessed!

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      • #18
        Originally posted by Rojik View Post
        I'd check Tooze or someone like that to see if the German economy could handle the diversion of steel needed to make the razors so necessary to stop the nun's unusually hairy legs from spoiling the whole plan.
        I think that I G Farben would have developed a suitable depilatory cream. After all, it's a short mission and the 'nuns' were expendable.
        Signing out.

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        • #19
          Originally posted by philiplaos View Post
          So many false assumptions in this plan. Just for starters, although the basic concept was introduced much earlier, the '99 flake ice-cream' did not become widespread in Britain until the 1960s.
          Well Phill, the specific tactical details can be left up to the Ice-cream vendor agents themselves. I'm sure other forms of Ice-cream can be used to replace the 99

          Also, you are ignoring the difficulty and cost of transporting the heavy equipment and refrigeration all the way across the Channel so they produce and store ice cream in the field during summer. Not to mention the fact that neither the Nazis nor the Italians of the time had the technical capability of mass producing such technology.
          I did say pretending to be ice-cream sellers. Whilst their act may may be undermined by a lack of actual ice-creams I'm sure even a small batch could be made using available materials to give the impression. I seem to recall my grandmother having a recipe for home-made ice cream.

          Typical, trying to point minor flaws in this otherwise seemless plan.


          ------
          'I would rather be exposed to the inconveniencies attending too much liberty than those attending too small a degree of it.' - Thomas Jefferson

          If you have questions about the forum please check the FAQ/Rules

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          • #20
            If they were to make another game in the Saints Row series, Saints Row Sealion, this whole plan would certainly be the game.
            "A foolish man thinks he knows everything if placed in unexpected difficulty; but he knows not what to answer, if to the test he is put."

            --Hávamál

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            • #21
              One part of the plans went slightly bad as the Germans deployed a crack unit of commandos but they had gotten bad advice from the "Idiots guide on how to intergrate with the locals" unfortunately they had the French version and roamed around the country side as onion and garlic sellers, to which their cover was blown, captured and tortured in the worst way possible, they endured 96 hours of Vera Lynne singing "The White Cliffs of Dover" on a continious loop, eventually their ears and eyes bled and they died of brain explosions

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              • #22
                Originally posted by Roddoss72 View Post
                One part of the plans went slightly bad as the Germans deployed a crack unit of commandos but they had gotten bad advice from the "Idiots guide on how to intergrate with the locals" unfortunately they had the French version and roamed around the country side as onion and garlic sellers, to which their cover was blown, captured and tortured in the worst way possible, they endured 96 hours of Vera Lynne singing "The White Cliffs of Dover" on a continious loop, eventually their ears and eyes bled and they died of brain explosions
                I heard that tune.....once was enough, and believe this to be the one thing in this thread that could actually have happened!

                A clear and sever violation of the Geneva Convention I tell yinz!

                Regards,
                Dennis
                If stupid was a criminal offense Sea Lion believers would be doing life.

                Shouting out to Half Pint for bringing back the big mugs!

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                • #23
                  Hats Off to Sealous.

                  This the ABSOLUTE ALL TIME BEST Sealion Thread I have ever seen - Bluddy Marvellous !!

                  Go for it - Really !!

                  It could even make a good Game on this Forum - providing that we all keep it VERY Humorous.

                  That is - things which go wrong, for the Germans or for the British, must be stupid and ridiculous things - in keeping with the Humorous requirement.

                  Lots and lots of Silly Technology, Silly Weapons, Silly Tactics, Silly Strategies, Silly History, and Tons of Silly Mistakes.

                  If the Germans decided to try to Invade the Silly Isles ( Scilly Isles ) - that could be Good Fun as well.

                  Parachuting Nuns, Italian Ice Cream Sellers, Flying Pigs - GREAT !! Keep the Silly Ideas coming, Fellas.
                  What you should NOT do at any time is to point out when things are not practical ( none of it SHOULD be practical ).
                  Criticisms should be aimed at people who are NOT SILLY ENOUGH !!

                  We could call it - "Operation Sillion", maybe.
                  G.M. - Sci Fi Game - the "Krissyverse"
                  Darius Jarvinger - Prime Minister of The Phoenix Confederation
                  Kris Martins - President of Attican Republic
                  Kaar Kristoff - Minister of Interior of The Phoenix Confederation

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                  • #24
                    You could have lots of Bavarians - in Lederhosen -
                    pretending to be Boy Scouts, with the big ones as Scoutmasters.

                    Their big sticks ( Scout Staves ) could really be Swordsticks - or they could be trained in Quarterstaff Fighting.

                    They could also tie people up with Ropes - but not being REAL Scouts, they would get the knots wrong ( NOT Reef Knots ), and the Roped-up Soldiers would escape.
                    G.M. - Sci Fi Game - the "Krissyverse"
                    Darius Jarvinger - Prime Minister of The Phoenix Confederation
                    Kris Martins - President of Attican Republic
                    Kaar Kristoff - Minister of Interior of The Phoenix Confederation

                    Comment


                    • #25
                      Originally posted by Karakris View Post
                      You could have lots of Bavarians - in Lederhosen -
                      pretending to be Boy Scouts, with the big ones as Scoutmasters.

                      Their big sticks ( Scout Staves ) could really be Swordsticks - or they could be trained in Quarterstaff Fighting.

                      They could also tie people up with Ropes - but not being REAL Scouts, they would get the knots wrong ( NOT Reef Knots ), and the Roped-up Soldiers would escape.
                      Oh and they'd also accidentally cut each other with knives, possibly even killing one or two, because they wouldn't have their Totin' Chit. OH and they'd burn down their camp because they wouldn't know how to properly create, control, and put out a fire, without their Fireman's Chit. (Whoever thought up that word...well we may know what he was doing at the time)
                      "A foolish man thinks he knows everything if placed in unexpected difficulty; but he knows not what to answer, if to the test he is put."

                      --Hávamál

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                      • #26
                        Chit used to mean note or paper in Anglo-Indian/Imperial English, does it come from there? I've only heard of the use of the term badge in connection with the scouts..
                        ------
                        'I would rather be exposed to the inconveniencies attending too much liberty than those attending too small a degree of it.' - Thomas Jefferson

                        If you have questions about the forum please check the FAQ/Rules

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                        • #27
                          This reminds me of an old Monty Python sketch of a British army court martial, "You are charged that you did not take this war seriously and that you did flick wet towels at the enemy."
                          Hitler played Golf. His bunker shot was a hole in one.

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                          • #28
                            Originally posted by Selous View Post
                            Chit used to mean note or paper in Anglo-Indian/Imperial English, does it come from there? I've only heard of the use of the term badge in connection with the scouts..
                            Ah ok, thanks!
                            "A foolish man thinks he knows everything if placed in unexpected difficulty; but he knows not what to answer, if to the test he is put."

                            --Hávamál

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                            • #29
                              Originally posted by T. A. Gardner View Post
                              Why is there a big chunk of wood in that ice cream cone?.... Never mind... It's British food.... That explains why someone would shove a stick in the middle of ice cream....
                              It's not a stick. It's a delicious Cadbury's chocolate flake which by the way, has gone right down the crapper after (the American) Kraft bought the company.

                              You Yanks can take the **** out of British grub all you like, but when it comes to chocolate we kick your American arses into touch any day of the week and then some - far superior.
                              "COOMMAAAAAAANNNNDOOOO!!!!!"
                              - Mad Jack Churchill.

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                              • #30
                                Originally posted by Tuck's Luck View Post
                                It's not a stick. It's a delicious Cadbury's chocolate flake which by the way, has gone right down the crapper after (the American) Kraft bought the company.

                                You Yanks can take the **** out of British grub all you like, but when it comes to chocolate we kick your American arses into touch any day of the week and then some - far superior.
                                Dammit, don't tell me our guys messed with Cadbury.

                                I humbly apologize on behalf of Americans.
                                "I ask, Sir, what is the militia? It is the whole people. To disarm the people is the best and most effectual way to enslave them."
                                George Mason
                                Co-author of the Second Amendment
                                during Virginia’s Convention to Ratify the Constitution, 1788

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