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Woman always get the last word, or???

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  • Woman always get the last word, or???

    Marriage (Part I )
    >
    > Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady, and
    >
    >
    > after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:
    >
    > 'I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time
    >
    > I want -- and I don't expect any hassle from you.
    >
    > I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless
    >
    > I tell you that I won't be home for dinner.
    >
    > I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing, and card-playing
    >
    > when I want with my old buddies, and don't you
    >
    > give me a hard time about it.
    >
    > Those are my rules. Any comments?'
    >
    >
    > His new bride said:
    >
    > 'No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex
    >
    > here at seven o'clock every night...whether you're here or not.'
    >
    > (DARN SHE'S GOOD!)
    >
    > ************ ********* ********* ********* *********
    >
    > Marriage (Part II)
    >
    >
    > Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th
    > wedding anniversary!
    >
    >
    >
    > The husband yells, 'When you die, I'm getting you a headstone
    >
    > that reads, 'Here Lies My Wife -- Cold As Ever'!'
    >
    >
    >
    > 'Yeah?' she replies. 'When you die, I'm getting you a headstone
    >
    > that reads, 'Here Lies My Husband -- Stiff At Last'!'
    >
    > (HE ASKED FOR IT!)
    >
    >
    > ************ ********* ********* ********* **
    >
    > Marriage (Part III)
    >
    >
    > Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast
    > table.
    >
    > Husband gets up in a rage and says, 'And you are no
    >
    > good in bed either,' and storms out of the house.
    > After some time he realizes he was nasty and
    >
    > decides to make amends and rings her up.
    >
    > She comes to the phone after many rings, and the irritated husband
    >
    > says, 'What took you so long to answer to the phone?'
    >
    >
    > She says, 'I was in bed.'
    >
    >
    > 'In bed this early, doing what?'
    >
    >
    > 'Getting a second opinion!'
    >
    >
    > (YEP, HE HAD THAT COMING, TOO!)
    >
    > ************ ********* ********* ********* **
    >
    > Marriage (Part IV)
    >
    >
    > A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement.
    >
    > He is so proud of himself, that he starts calling his
    >
    > wife,' Mother of Six' in spite of her objections.
    >
    >
    >
    > One night, they go to a party. The man decides that it is time to
    > go home
    >
    > and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He shouts
    >
    > at the top of his voice, 'Shall we go home Mother of Six?'
    >
    >
    >
    > His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion,
    >
    > shouts right back, 'Any time you're ready, Father of Four.'
    >
    >
    >
    > (RIGHT ON, LADY!)
    >
    > ************ ********* ********* ********* **
    >
    > THE SILENT TREATMENT
    >
    > A man and his wife were having some problems at home
    >
    > and were giving each other the silent treatment.
    >
    > Suddenly the man realized that the next day he would need his wife
    >
    > to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.
    >
    > Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote
    > on a piece
    >
    > of paper,'Please wake me at 5:00 AM.' He left it where he knew she
    > would find it.
    >
    > The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it
    >
    > was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight.
    >
    >
    >
    > Furious, he was about to go to see why his wife hadn't wakened him
    > when he
    >
    > noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, 'It is 5:00
    > AM. Wake up.'
    >
    >
    >
    > Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
    >
    >
    "Ask not what your country can do for you"

    Left wing, Right Wing same bird that they are killing.

    you’re entitled to your own opinion but not your own facts.

  • #2
    A lot of sense there. Being a veteran of almost 33 years of marriage I still haven't figured out why a 1-1 vote on an issue always turns into a landslide victory for her?!
    If stupid was a criminal offense Sea Lion believers would be doing life.

    Shouting out to Half Pint for bringing back the big mugs!

    Comment


    • #3
      Congrats on your perseverance, D1J1! You get a vote? Coming up on 33 myself. I gave up trying to beat the odds years ago. She could teach Caesar....
      She's reading over my shoulder again. Darn, she moves quietly. Yes dear. No dear. I didn't...no, dear....owowowowowowow!
      All questions are valid, all answers are tentative.

      Comment


      • #4
        If you want to survive a marriage, read Sun Zu.

        Be prepared to read slowly the parts about understanding yourself. Not just the parts about knowing your enemy.

        Women have as many weaknesses as men, but your own weaknesses are often more damaging if you refuse to see them.

        Damn I'm starting to sound like that blasted Mohiam.
        Life is change. Built models for decades.
        Not sure anyone here actually knows the real me.
        I didn't for a long time either.

        Comment


        • #5
          Those jokes aren't funny now and they weren't funny in the July 1995 issue of Reader's Digest.

          Comment


          • #6
            Ok sour puss...
            "In modern war... you will die like a dog for no good reason."
            Ernest Hemingway.

            "We're all going to die, all of us; what a circus! That alone should make us love each other, but it doesn't. We are terrorised and flattened by trivialities."
            Bukowski

            Comment


            • #7
              Life must be very boring in in the North of California.

              HP
              "Ask not what your country can do for you"

              Left wing, Right Wing same bird that they are killing.

              you’re entitled to your own opinion but not your own facts.

              Comment


              • #8
                I'm glad I'm still a teenager.
                "You can tell a lot about a fella's character by whether he picks out all of one color or just grabs a handful." -explaining why Reagan liked to have a jar of jelly beans on hand for important meetings

                CO for 1st S.INC Shock Security Troop

                Comment

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