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  • Originally posted by Kaiser Franz View Post
    hmmm -- probably a delicacy in the Himalayans - but I'm inclined to think that anything from the Himalayans is bound to be "tough" and probably a bit "tangy"
    It should taste like fresh mountain breeze.

    Try the Double-Hump Camel Cheese Curd.
    Flag: USA / Location: West Coast

    Prayers.

    BoRG

    http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/8757/snap1ws8.jpg

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PtsX_Z3CMU

    Comment


    • Originally posted by Torien View Post
      Gus-Gus won't go down without a fight!

      Citizen Victorius promise an easy solution.
      Flag: USA / Location: West Coast

      Prayers.

      BoRG

      http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/8757/snap1ws8.jpg

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PtsX_Z3CMU

      Comment


      • Senator Honorius sends new recipe from Han Empire:

        Stewed donkey with beans
        Flag: USA / Location: West Coast

        Prayers.

        BoRG

        http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/8757/snap1ws8.jpg

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PtsX_Z3CMU

        Comment


        • The Emperor has adopted!

          All Hail Zed Junior!

          Flag: USA / Location: West Coast

          Prayers.

          BoRG

          http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/8757/snap1ws8.jpg

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PtsX_Z3CMU

          Comment


          • Congratulations Sal! Zed Jr. looks, er...satisfied?
            History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon. Napoleon Bonaparte
            _________
            BoRG
            __________
            "I am Arthur, King of the Britons!"

            Comment


            • Originally posted by Torien View Post
              Congratulations Sal! Zed Jr. looks, er...satisfied?
              Good dental care leads to healthy diet. I am awaiting the heavy duty dental floss from Franzius!
              Flag: USA / Location: West Coast

              Prayers.

              BoRG

              http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/8757/snap1ws8.jpg

              https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PtsX_Z3CMU

              Comment


              • Originally posted by salinator View Post
                Senator Honorius sends new recipe from Han Empire:

                Stewed donkey with beans
                on toast?
                Sail on Britannia.

                Comment


                • The Ostrich Leg ban has been lifted! The Ostrich farming industry welcomes a revival of consumer confidence that Ostrich is a food, not a weapon.

                  ---------------

                  Be advised that Giraffe has now been placed on List XXIV in accordance to the Roman Endangered Species Act of XXXII AD.

                  Giraffe hooves are now banned for use as cure for Gout, and no parts of any giraffe may now be used as an aphrodisiac. For more details, refer to the public scroll site of the Roman Food and Herbal Remedies Administration.

                  ---------------

                  Public Notice:


                  Frazius of Noricum, purveyor of toothless animals, peddler of carts-without-wheels, seller of cheap and useless products at the RomeMart..........................

                  I)The Emperor demands a full refund for that cheap Celtic pink fabric you sent him in lieu of the Han Purple Silk that he orderd. Be advised that you may also be responsible for replacing all the white Imperial togas that have been dyed pink by your shoddy product.


                  II)The Imperial Accountant still awaits for an itemized invoice as previously requested.


                  III)The Roman Transport Safety Agency wishes to discuss your carts-without-wheels.


                  IV)The Roman Department of Public Works would like to discuss the cost of repairs for the damage caused to Roman Roads by your carts-without-wheels.


                  V)The Vegan Society of Rome contends that your "Franz 57 Sauce" does in fact not only contain non-vegan ingredients, but also only include 42 ingredients, one of which is rat hair.

                  Also, the department of Roman Weights and Measure request that you contact them to arrange an appointed time for a meeting.
                  Last edited by Salinator; 16 Jan 09, 02:13.
                  Flag: USA / Location: West Coast

                  Prayers.

                  BoRG

                  http://img204.imageshack.us/img204/8757/snap1ws8.jpg

                  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PtsX_Z3CMU

                  Comment


                  • Will my victory arch have a minimal height limit, so Zed junior doesn't knock his head while strolling under it...
                    "In modern war... you will die like a dog for no good reason."
                    Ernest Hemingway.

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by salinator View Post
                      The Ostrich Leg ban has been lifted! The Ostrich farming industry welcomes a revival of consumer confidence that Ostrich is a food, not a weapon.
                      yay! now we can stab... er, I mean, eat with our fellow romans...



                      Originally posted by salinator View Post
                      Be advised that Giraffe has now been placed on List XXIV in accordance to the Roman Endangered Species Act of XXXII AD.
                      you mean camoleopard?

                      Originally posted by salinator View Post
                      Giraffe hooves are now banned for use as cure for Gout, and no parts of any giraffe may now be used as an aphrodisiac. For more details, refer to the public scroll site of the Roman Food and Herbal Remedies Administration.

                      what about my gran's rheumatism?!


                      Originally posted by salinator View Post
                      I)The Emperor demands a full refund for that cheap Celtic pink fabric you sent him in lieu of the Han Purple Silk that he orderd. Be advised that you may also be responsible for replacing all the white Imperial togas that have been dyed pink by your shoddy product.
                      the celts are selling fabric now? oh dear...

                      Originally posted by salinator View Post
                      II)The Imperial Accountant still awaits for an itemized invoice as previously requested.
                      the Imperial Ripoff Service waits for no man. (except sal)

                      Originally posted by salinator View Post
                      III)The Roman Transport Safety Agency wishes to discuss your carts-without-wheels.
                      carts without wheels?

                      Originally posted by salinator View Post
                      IV)The Roman Department of Public Works would like to discuss the cost of repairs for the damage caused to Roman Roads by your carts-without-wheels.
                      I tripped on a massive gouge yeterday... Is that where they came from?

                      Originally posted by salinator View Post
                      V)The Vegan Society of Rome contends that your "Franz 57 Sauce" does in fact not only contain non-vegan ingredients, but also only include 42 ingredients, one of which is rat hair.
                      rat hair? is that a delicassy in noricum?

                      Originally posted by salinator View Post
                      Also, the department of Roman Weights and Measure request that you contact them to arrange an appointed time for a meeting.
                      oooooh you in truuuuuble...
                      Sail on Britannia.

                      Comment


                      • Originally posted by salinator View Post


                        Frazius of Noricum, purveyor of toothless animals, peddler of carts-without-wheels, seller of cheap and useless products at the RomeMart..........................


                        I)The Emperor demands a full refund for that cheap Celtic pink fabric you sent him in lieu of the Han Purple Silk that he orderd. Be advised that you may also be responsible for replacing all the white Imperial togas that have been dyed pink by your shoddy product.

                        Yes - Yes - Of Course -- A full refund will be immediately forthcoming - the instant the invoice I sent to you is paid - in full There will, of course, be a 30% restocking charge and some nominal shipping and handling deductions.

                        Regarding "Pink Togas" -- I can not be held responsible for the error of a "Laundress" - not in my employ- in placing white things in the washer with colored items. And then again, perhaps the sexual proclivities of some citizens wearing pink togas are more aptly displayed by their choice of color in attire



                        Originally posted by salinator View Post
                        II)The Imperial Accountant still awaits for an itemized invoice as previously requested.
                        Our accountants are working night and day to prepare the invoice you have requested - you will, no doubt, be astounded at it's magnificence!! We will, of course, expect immediate payment

                        Originally posted by salinator View Post
                        III)The Roman Transport Safety Agency wishes to discuss your carts-without-wheels.
                        Ahhh Yes -- the Carts-without-wheels <sigh> Are we now to be held responsible for the failures of others ??? Our policy has always been to satisfy the needs of our customers by offering all available accessories at a nominal charge. We can not be held responsible for our clients electing to purchase the cart without the recommended "Wheel" upgrade option.

                        Originally posted by salinator View Post
                        IV)The Roman Department of Public Works would like to discuss the cost of repairs for the damage caused to Roman Roads by your carts-without-wheels.
                        Again - we must defer to the judgment of our clients and place the onus on their shoulders for opting out of the added cost of wheels. Accessories to their purchase can not be mandated - they must be selected by the client - our documentation is very clear -- all responsibility rests with the buyer. Our tail light warranty extends only to the extent that the lights on the cart are visible from our shop on the day of purchase. As you can imagine, most of our sales are made in broad daylight - shortening our warranty even further

                        Originally posted by salinator View Post
                        V)The Vegan Society of Rome contends that your "Franz 57 Sauce" does in fact not only contain non-vegan ingredients, but also only include 42 ingredients, one of which is rat hair.
                        The 57 ingredients are all present in our delicious sauce -- you must understand that we have 15 employees working round the clock - in sweltering heat - bending over the preparation vats - sweating profusely - blowing their noses and coughing due to the pollution in the air of Rome -- the personally contributed "added ingredients" may not be discernible by the primitive analysis methods being used by the Vegan Society. And, quite frankly, I'm fairly certain they don't really want to know what's in the mix

                        Regarding the "Rat hair" -- Francois the Gaul lost a little hair during the preparation of our most recent concoction - and he does bear a remarkable resemblance to a Rat - he may, in fact, have similar mannerisms, but he assures me that he is no rat -- merely a fink !!


                        Originally posted by salinator View Post
                        Also, the department of Roman Weights and Measure request that you contact them to arrange an appointed time for a meeting.
                        I will be most pleased to present myself to those luminaries at Weights and Measure - there is the matter of an outstanding billing that needs to be discussed. Our talented craftsmen recently repaired and adjusted their antiquated equipment and our renumeration has not, as yet, been received. We will, therefor, delay delivery of the balance of their repair order until such time as we are paid for work previously completed.




                        Franzius of Noricum -- Merchant Guild Alderman
                        I like Dogs far better than most People

                        As our Supply Sargent once said "If'n you only got one - order one - If'n you got Two - turn one in !! (???)

                        BoRG

                        Comment


                        • franz, you shoulda been a car salesman instead of an engineer.
                          Sail on Britannia.

                          Comment


                          • Franzius of Noricum , Alderman of the Merchant's Guild, has the full backing and support of the Roman Mercantile Sub-Committee on Intra-City Affairs. And Senator Torienus, being the Chair of said committee, wishes it to be known that Franzius and all of his Brethren of the Guild are protected from Civil & Class Actions and Lawsuits!

                            By virtue of S.R.1121, all attempts at collection of fees from Franzius and his associates, will, from henceforth, be litigated and investigated by the law firm of Duey, Cheatem, & Howe. Please submit all requests on a 6' x 3' slab of the purest marble, in triplicate!

                            Bernie Madoff, Scribe to His Most Honourable Senator Torienus

                            History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon. Napoleon Bonaparte
                            _________
                            BoRG
                            __________
                            "I am Arthur, King of the Britons!"

                            Comment


                            • The Imperial Prison is Complete!!!

                              I've just received the news that your penal facility has finally been completed. It is located to the south of Rome, in the suburbs and can house 250 convicts.
                              People of Rome..., Senators..., Generals..., and Foriegn Diplomats...

                              The construction of the Imperial Prison Facility has finally been completed!

                              This project will improve the quality of life in our city, and across all of Rome's conquested lands. The facility will house the most dangerous of Rome's enemies, and provide employment for some of Rome's finest men. And with this building we have sent a message throughout the land.

                              We are a people dedicated to rule of law, and to justice for all people.

                              Let all those who doubt that cast their gaze on this marvelous acheivement. The People of Rome spoke to me, and demanded action against the city's criminal element. Together, we have made Rome safe for her People once again.

                              I give thanks to those who supported this project, without you this would not be possible. The credit is yours.

                              And without further delay, let operations begin at the Maximus Falco Imperial Penal Facility..., named for our most notorious criminal...


                              ~Senator Antonius "Fat Tony" Soprano~
                              ~From the Streets of Rome~
                              "This life..., you know, "the life." Youíre not gonna get any medals, kid. This is not a hero business; you donít shoot people from a mile a way. You gotta stand right next to them... blow their heads off."

                              BoRG

                              Comment


                              • OH Please !!!

                                My Lions are starving and you plan to house criminals ( food on the hoof ) behind bars ??

                                What do you expect my Lions to eat if criminals are now to be housed, at tax payer expense, rather than have them provide a bit of nourishment for my anorexic Lions ??


                                Franzius of Noricum - Advocate for Lion Justice
                                I like Dogs far better than most People

                                As our Supply Sargent once said "If'n you only got one - order one - If'n you got Two - turn one in !! (???)

                                BoRG

                                Comment

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